Investing In Peace

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Dear Peace-Deprived,

Are you satisfied with the progress you’ve made so far this year? If not, you still have time to make some positive changes in 2011. There are three weeks left in the year. Lucky for you, it only takes 21 days to start/break a habit. What’s one positive change you would like to accomplish in 2012? What’s one thing you have no desire to bring into your New Year? What areas of your life are you struggling to find peace…  finances? your relationship with God? your marriage? your job? your health/weight? What do you do that stresses you out? Think about it. Go ahead… take a few minutes. Got it? Good. Now that you’ve identified your struggle, let’s do something about it. There’s a simple solution to your complex case: you have to start doing things that will produce harmony instead of hostility; serenity instead of stress. You have to start investing in peace.

An investment is simply a commitment of time, energy, or resources with the expectation of future gain. Simply put, it’s sowing a seed to reap a reward.  Your life is a giant investment portfolio of the decisions you make and the risks you take. The value of your portfolio (aka, your self-worth) is based upon how much weight you give to your experiences and accomplishments. Your daily actions and behaviors are an investment of your time/energy/resources that will reap either positive or negative results. If your portfolio is consistently experiencing poor performance, you have to get rid of what’s weighing you down and begin investing in things that will bring you peace. What stress/struggle do you want to be free from in 2012? Well, in order to make that happen, you’ve got to start tackling it today. You must become proactive instead of reactive (lead by your emotions). Let’s handle that, shall we? Here’s your investment plan:

1. State your objective. What is the primary goal you are trying to accomplish… a better handle on your finances? debt reduction? weight loss? lower blood pressure/cholesterol? Whatever your goal is, make sure it’s S.M.A.R.T. (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Time-bound). Let’s say you want to build up your cash reserves. A S.M.A.R.T. goal would look like this:

“I want to have an additional $3,000 in my emergency fund by 12/31/2012. I will accomplish this goal by saving $250/month into my savings account for the next 12 months. I will monitor my progress quarterly. Because I have created a budget based on my income and expenses, I can realistically expect to save $750 per quarter (which will total $3,000 for the year). Yes, I can do this!”

Write the vision and make it plain. Put your objective in writing and read it aloud to yourself. You are more likely to reach a goal if you simply write it down. And hearing yourself voice your desire causes you to take ownership of your objective. Investing in peace is all about knowing what you want for yourself. You can’t change anyone else and nobody can change you. You have to do this for your own peace of mind.

2. Identify the positive rewards of accomplishing your objective.  Investing in peace will reap some wonderful rewards: less stress, more joy, better sleep, healthier attitude towards yourself and others, etc. Make a list of all the perks that come as a result of reaching your objective. This is the positive return on your investment.

3. Identify the negative consequences of not reaching your goal. Write down the “poor performance” you might experience if you don’t start investing in peace. Depending on your goal, some examples may include: depression, stress, anxiety, increased debt, reduced savings, heart attack, stroke, poor self-image, hopelessness, strife, etc. This is the negative return on your investment. Compare this list to the list of your positive rewards. Which would you prefer? Keep both of these lists in mind when you get discouraged. Oftentimes, we don’t think twice about divulging in unhealthy behavior when we don’t acknowledge the risks associated with it.

4. Get a Peace Partner. This is someone you trust who can respectfully hold you accountable to reaching your goal (and who is not struggling in the same area you are). They will be there to keep you on track when you want to give up. And they will celebrate your  accomplishments in the process. Having someone to hold you accountable will significantly increase your ability to make your dreams come true.

5. Manage your risk. Reduce/eliminate your distractions. What people, places, and/or things often distract you from staying on course? If you’re trying to save money, you probably shouldn’t hang out with friends who spend money like it grows on trees. If you’re trying to reduce your debt, stop carrying your credit cards in your wallet. It’s amazing how much easier it will be to focus on your goal when your vision isn’t clouded with temptation.

6. Take a daily Peace Pill. What is ONE Thing you can do every day to help you reach your objective? This is your Peace Pill. Doing ONE Thing consistently everyday for the next 21 days will help you form a positive habit that will not only assist you in reaching your goal, but will also give you more peace in the process. It’s much easier to reach a goal if you break it down into baby steps. Smaller pills are far less difficult to swallow. So, focus on changing just one bad habit at a time for 3 weeks straight.

7. Monitor your progress. Break your goal down into shorter intervals and monitor your progress accordingly. Check in with your Peace Partner to let them know how you’re doing and discuss any challenges/frustrations you might have. And don’t beat yourself up if you fall off the wagon… just jump right back on and keep it moving!

FYI: It’s not good enough to simply know these steps. You must implement them in order for them to work. Commit to this process and above all else, invite God to lead the way. Stay prayerful. Seek His face throughout each of these 7 steps. The Holy Spirit will guide you and the Prince of Peace will keep you. Investing in peace is about doing the little things that will produce positive results for your peace of mind. It’s about taking good risks. Make a conscious decision to invest in your peace every day- no matter how big or small. Consistency is key. Acknowledge how counterproductive it is to waste your time, money, and energy on things that will ultimately steal your joy. Short-term pleasure often produces long-term pain. Enough of that already! You’ve been going in circles for too long… can we agree that it’s gotten you nowhere? Take ownership of where you are and how you got there. Here’s the good news: when you focus on doing the right thing, you leave little room for the wrong thing to take root. Even when you experience the volatility of life, you can experience positive performance. You’ll be more at peace with yourself and others, and your quality of life will grow exponentially. Sounds like an excellent return on investment, if you ask me!! Peace is priceless… get yours today! 🙂

Practically Yours,

~The Practical Chick

P.S. If you’re dealing with long-term issues that you can’t seem to resolve on your own, or if you feel your situation is hopeless, don’t give up! Seek the counsel of your Pastor, therapist, or other mental health professional. For additional resources, check out ShareCare at www.share.care.com, or the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)…. www.NAMI.org or (800) 950-NAMI. Support, education, information, referral and advocacy is available to you! It’s not too late. You can do it, and they can help!

Run for Your Life

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Dear Fellow Runaways,

During a friendly game of tag in 3rd grade, I was tripped by a boy named Keith. There were a gazillion kids chasing each other in the school yard that day, and I was the one person who managed to fall. Wearing a cute little dress and my favorite Winter coat (khaki-colored with creme trim… I loved that lil coat!), I fell face down on the concrete. My big Urkel-like glasses flew off my little face and landed a few feet away. I could hear a swarm of kids circling around me, and my best friend, Julie, came running to my side. My head hurt and my knees were sore, but I was OK… or so I thought. As I was being helped up, I couldn’t help but notice my blood hugging the cement. Julie picked up my glasses and screamed “part of your brain fell out!!!” I looked at my ginormous glasses and saw something green and bloody smashed on one of the lenses. That’s when I lost it. I began crying uncontrollably and was escorted to the nurse’s office. My cute little coat was now khaki and crimson. My dad picked me up from school and took me to the hospital where the hole in my forehead was stitched shut (and I’m pretty sure they didn’t use anesthesia… it hurt so bad the doctors had to strap me down!!). We caught the bus- yes, public transportation- back home and I went to school for the next week with my forehead bandaged like an Egyptian mummy. Go ahead, you can laugh.

From that day forth, I vowed to never run again. I ran away from my fear instead of facing it. I was truly traumatized by that fall! I hated running. Didn’t even like running for the bus! Didn’t even want my nose to run (LOL). I was probably suffering from PTSD or something. It was pretty pathetic. As silly as it sounds, I was scared to death to run! So, what did I do? One day, many years later, I decided to start training for a marathon (’cause that’s what any rational person would do, right? :-D).

My girl, Denine, and I both signed up and started training in May 2004. Our endurance was negligible at best. Being one of the world’s most non-athletic individuals, I could barely run a quarter of a mile at that point. But I committed to the training program, running alone 3 days per week and with the training group every Saturday- rain or shine! We completed the Philadelphia Distance Run (a half marathon, which is 13.1 miles) in September 2004. I managed to run 10 miles straight without stopping… only because I had to go to the bathroom really bad, and all the port-a-potties I passed were disgusting. So I kept running, hoping to find a half-way decent “facility” (never found one, by the way). By the time I reached the 10th mile, I gave myself a break and started walking (HUGE mistake! It’s hard to start back up once you stop. Momentum is key!). I thought my legs were going to fall off and I’m pretty sure that would have been far less painful… but I managed to cross that finish line anyway. Two months later (November 21, 2004), Denine and I ran the Philly Marathon (the full 26.2 miles). It took me nearly the entire 6 hours allotted to complete the race, but I did it. And Denine recently finished her 2nd half-marathon. God bless her!!

There are some folks who run marathons on a regular basis. They can finish a full marathon in less time than it took me to finish the 1/2 marathon. Shoot, there were folks who walked the entire race, and still finished before me! There was even a woman- 7 1/2 months pregnant- who finished before I did!  I tip my hat off to them all. My goal was not to win the race (as evidenced by the way I began slacking with my training as the days grew shorter and the weather waxed colder)… I just wanted to face my fears and finish the race.

I can not begin to express the sheer excitement, pride, joy, and ultimate satisfaction I felt when I finally crossed that finish line. It is a feeling like no other. To keep pressing forward in spite of your fears, in spite of your pain, and in spite of your flesh begging you to give up ….it was exhilarating (SIDE NOTE: don’t keep going if your heart tells you to stop. I mean that literally and metaphorically. Running a race that’s killing you is not worth it!). And to cross that finish line, knowing that you gave it your all and you finally reached your goal… that’s a blessing in and of itself!

When is the last time you faced your fears and challenged yourself beyond your perceived limitations? What fear has paralyzed you from doing more, having more, or being more than you are today? What’s that  “one thing” you’ve always wanted to try? What race have you started but failed to finish because the road was too long or too tough?  It’s normal to want to give up when times get hard. Your flesh will attempt to dissuade you every time. But when you set your mind to something, train properly, and commit to reaching your goal, then you, too, can cross that finish line of victory. It’s not too late. Have you started 2011 with a list of goals that you have yet to reach? Pick up where you left off, change your thinking (that’s where the training comes in), and start running again. The better you train, the less likely you are to suffer injury when the going gets tough. You can do it with God’s help. “God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7). You already have the tools you need to run the race. You just have to put your faith (and your feet) in motion.

The marathon aggravated a prior knee injury, so no more long distance running for me. But I’m so proud to say that I am one of only 1% of the world’s population that has completed a marathon. I have faced many tests and trials since 2004, and I can now look back and remind myself that I finished those races in spite of literally wanting to quit with every step I took. If I survived that grueling (albeit self-imposed) conquest, surely I can get through anything! In March 2012,  I’ll be participating in the Philadelphia Stair Climb (climbing 50 flights of stairs to raise money for The American Lung Association… less damaging to my knees than a marathon, but challenging nonetheless!). It’s been a while since I really provoked myself physically and I’m ready to get it IN. Physical training is much more of an emotional and mental feat than anything else. Challenges stimulate growth which is necessary for life… Anything that isn’t growing is dead. I’m too young to die and so are you. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, change your thinking and get to stepping. You have an abundant life to live. Get out your comfort zone. Try something new. Stretch beyond your circumstances. Face your fears and finish your race victoriously. With all due respect, get a life… and run for it! 😉

Practically Yours,

~The Practical Chick

P.S. Although some may beg to differ, my brain didn’t fall out when I fell in 3rd grade. That bloody green thing stuck to my glasses was a piece of shrub. Just goes to show: when you’re in the midst of a traumatic experience, everything looks worse than it is. Don’t believe the hype… believe the Hope! 🙂