Author Archives: The Practical Chick

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About The Practical Chick

Heir of Salvation. Pastor's Wife. Wealth Manager. Photo Enthusiast. Practical Chick.

Jesus Was a Mourning Person

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Dear Bedside Baptist,

I am not a morning person. Never have been. My brain seems to function best late at night. I am a night owl extraordinaire! When I was a teenager, my biggest gripe about going to church was that it started too early in the morning. I would rather sleep in bed than get up early and fall asleep in church. I just wasn’t a morning person. I often hear grown-ups use the same excuse for not going to church- it’s just too early. I get that. I once believed the same thing. Yep, I get it… What they’re really saying is that it’s just not a priority.

What if Jesus wasn’t a morning Person? What if He didn’t bother to hang up on the Cross early in the morning to die for our sins? What if our salvation just wasn’t that important to Him?

Not only was Jesus a morning person, but He was a mourning person. Mourning is an emotional expression of deep sorrow or grief. It acknowledges the reality of loss. Authentic mourning requires intense vulnerability. Jesus mourned lost souls. He identified with Mary and Martha over the death of Lazarus. While in the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus agonized over His impending crucifixion. Luke 22:44 tells us that as He prayed to the Father, His “sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.” He was deeply grieved over the knowledge of being separated from His Father as He died on the Cross. And He mourned for you and me. Jesus was a mourning Person.

In fact, it was His mourning that led Him to the Cross. He loved His body (aka- the Church, aka- you and me) so much that He sacrificed Himself so we wouldn’t have to die for our sins. Wow. Let that sit with you for a moment. Whether “big” or “small”, every sin you committed was befitting of a crime punishable by death (eternal separation from God). Jesus paid the price for that sin. Your sin. My sin. Our sins nailed Jesus to the Cross. But His love for us kept Him on the Cross. He could have easily said, “Forget it. These ingrates will only turn their backs on Me and deny me again. I know how they do. They’d love to join Me in Heaven, but they won’t appreciate the Hell I’m going through to get them there. I’m full of eternal life and they’re just full of excuses. Why bother?”  He could have saved Himself and let us pay the penalty for our own sins. Thank God He was a mourning Person.

It grieves me to hear folks rattle off excuse after excuse about why they don’t go to church: too tired, too busy, too many hypocrites, too early in the morning, too this, too that. Blah, blah, blah. Being a Pastor’s wife, I see first hand the hours dedicated to studying the Word and preparing a sermon that the congregation will only get to hear for 30-45 minutes on Sunday morning. I know the toil that sometimes goes into preparing Bible Study Lessons and the time management required to balance home, work, church, etc. (my husband, like many Pastors, is bi-vocational). I see the prayer, frustration, care, concern, and sacrifice involved with being the Under-Shepherd of a flock of individuals. But what trumps all that is knowing that the Good Shepherd laid down His life to provide eternal life and abundant life to His wayward sheep. I get offended when folks don’t commit to attending their local church. Yes, I kind of take it personally. It’s like they’re taking my Savior for granted! How can you truly confess that Jesus is first in your life when you are content with keeping Him last? Does His crucifixion mean nothing to you?

We need to go to church and Jesus expects us to go to church- on a regular basis. Every born-again believer needs to be a member of a local church (not TV church or on-line church). As I have creatively outlined in “How Deep Is Your Love?”, your commitment to your church is a clear indication of your relationship and commitment to Christ. Hebrews 10:25 instructs us not to “give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but to encourage one another…” We were created to be in relationship with each other- yep, even the hypocrites. (Side Note: saying that God is first in your life but willfully disobeying His commandments is rather, uh- hypocritical, don’t you think?). As our buddy, Pastor Tejado Hanchell (@TWH_PhD) always says, “there are hypocrites at your job, and you still go to work.   Go to church.” And might I add, you show up on time for work, so show up on time for church! Is Jesus mourning your lack of faithfulness?

You know those spiritual gifts you possess? They were given to you for the edification of the church- not for your own personal gain (see Ephesians 4:11-13).The church is in need of your gifts. Stop hoarding them. Are you grieving the Holy Spirit with your arrogance and selfishness?

Too often, too many folks have a lop-sided view of church. They consider it a place to go instead of a place to grow. They see it as a means to get something from God instead of giving back to God. Their perspective is skewed. As a result, they become spiritually malnourished and never fully develop in the things of God. How much more effective would we be as the body of Christ if we went to church to worship our Lord and Savior instead of seeking spiritual entertainment? What if we put our flesh aside and committed to serving the house of God with our gifts and talents? What if we sought to encourage our brothers and sisters, instead of judging them? After all, they’re just as human as we are. It’s pretty difficult to show care and concern for the fellow members of your church when you avoid being in their presence. What if our friends and families started taking our faith seriously because they finally see us taking it seriously? Imagine how much more effectively we could witness to our loved ones if we were living out what we talked about! What if folks lined up to get inside the church like they line up to get inside a store when a new Apple product hits the market? And what if we learned to mourn the loss of souls like Jesus did- to the point where we die to our flesh so we can share the Good News of eternal life in Christ? Imagine that!

I wish someone explained to me early on why it is so important to go to church. Perhaps I wouldn’t have made so many excuses not to go. Maybe I would have made my relationship with Christ more of a priority and set aside my childish ways a little sooner.

I am not a morning person. Never have been. Probably never will be. But I have grown enough to know that there is more to life than sleeping in on Sunday morning. I don’t want the Lord to find me sleeping on Him like He found the apostles after He finished those agonizing prayers in the Garden of Gethsemane. I don’t want to be that shallow Saint anymore. I denounced my membership at Bedside Baptist years ago. No, I’m not a morning person, but it is a privilege and honor to get up to worship and serve the Lord. I don’t do it begrudgingly or out of tradition. It’s out of willful obedience and love. Sure, sometimes I’d rather stay in the comfort of my bed when it’s too cold or too rainy, or when I’m just too tired, too busy, or to lazy to get up and go. But if Jesus got up on that rugged Cross for me (even though He didn’t feel like it), surely I can get up to be with Him- in the fellowship of other believers. Jesus was a mourning Person. He’s already mourned over me. I don’t want to be a grievance to His Spirit.

Practically Yours,

~The Practical Chick

Crack Kills

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Dear Struggling and Strung Out,

One more hit. Just one more rush. It’ll be your last time, for the last time. For real this time. Just one more intoxicating high and you’re all done. At least that’s what you tell your self… and your friends… and your kids. But before you know it, one hit turns into two and two hits turn into too many tomorrows and suddenly, you see your self years later- still strung out. You tried to let it go, but the lifestyle keeps calling you back. You risk all that you have for the comfort of just one more hit. Hooked, you give in for the last time- again. The hole in your heart cries for mercy, but you cave- yet again, to the false security of empty promises and lust-filled fervor. You’re looking for love in all the wrong places and filling the void with temporary pleasure. Instead of self-improving, you’re self-medicating… diseasing your mind in the process. You want more. You deserve more, but just can’t imagine life without the fantastic lies you’ve grown accustomed to. And so you settle- once again- for a life of loneliness and shame. You settle for a cracked life. No drugs necessary- you are addicted to the stability of your comfort zone. Yes, you’re cracked at the core, filling every crevice of your being with nothingness. No, no drugs necessary. But this crack does kill.

Crack will have you dressed up, stressed out, standing still, lying down, living for lust and dying for love. You’ll find yourself doing things you never thought you would do. Who or what has you open like that? Who’s got you climbing the walls and leaving a piece of your soul in their bed every time? What’s keeping you from your Promised Land? What cracks are in your foundation? I know- you want to do better, but you’re stuck. It’s like the world is turning so fast and you want to get off the ride, but you’ve grown accustomed to the cycle. It’s familiar. Some of the symptoms may be physical, emotional or even financial, but the core issue is spiritual. And unfortunately, withdrawal is short-term when sobriety seems impossible. But take heed to the following and you will overcome your dysfunction once and for all.

1. Acknowledge Your Problem– I know, that seems too simple. But it’s true. If you don’t acknowledge that you’re engaging in self-destructive behavior you’ll never be able to get the help you need. Face it- you’re strung out on him, her, a high-maintenance lifestyle, maybe even the rush of pounding your fist to someone’s face. Your life has become unmanageable. Everyone sees it, and you’ve refused to believe it. Stop making excuses and you’ll start making progress. Crack kills, but it doesn’t have to kill you.

2. Kill it at The Root- When you truly want to be free of something, you eliminate every trace of it. Otherwise, even the smallest seed will begin to grow by simply watering it with your attention. When the children of Israel were preparing to enter the Promised Land, the Lord instructed them

“to destroy their enemies totally. Make no treaty with them, and show them no mercy.” (Deuteronomy 7:2)

Now, please don’t get it twisted. I am not advising you to kill anyone (besides, our struggle isn’t against flesh and blood but of evil spirits in heavenly places. See Ephesians 6:12). What I recommend is that you destroy all ties to anyone or anything with a poisonous presence in your life. If it’s a person, get rid of their souvenirs (gifts, clothes, etc.). Stop staring at their picture. Delete their number from your phone- it’s only going to remind you of them every time you scroll by. Take their e-mail out of your contacts list. Stop calling them, and stop accepting their calls. No more text messages, DM’s, in-boxing or on-line chats. Defriend and unfollow. They don’t love you and you don’t need them. Love doesn’t live in double lives and secret seductions. It doesn’t dwell between the sheets of manipulation and abuse. And it certainly doesn’t hurt…. Perhaps you have an issue with overspending. Stop carrying the credit cards in your wallet. Discontinue the e-mail reminders for shoe sales and special events. Stop negotiating with the negative forces in your life. You can’t afford to flirt with temptation. Destroy it before it destroys you!

3. Expose The Cracks- Take some time to discover who you really are and how you got to this low place. What cracks are in your foundation? What led you to fill your void with false love? If necessary, seek professional help. The sooner you expose the hurt, the sooner you can mend your brokenness.

4. Seal The Cracks– This is the last vital step to take. You have to seal the cracks. Just ridding yourself of the temptation isn’t good enough. You can get rid of every booty call in your phone book, but if you don’t change your environment, break free from your circle of “friends”, and begin to see yourself as worthy of true love, you’ll find yourself attracting the same parasites all over again. Likewise, you can clean out your entire closet and one day find yourself binge shopping because you never got a healthy dose of self-esteem. You don’t see yourself as more than enough- without all the external clutter. Jesus warns,

“When an evil spirit comes out of a man, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it. Then it says, ‘I will return to the house I left.’ When it arrives, it finds the house swept clean and put in order. Then it goes and takes several other spirits more evil than itself, and they go in and live there. And the final condition of that man is worse than the first.” (Luke 11:25-26).

If you have tried to rid yourself of the temptations in your life only to find that you are worse off than before, it’s probably because you never sealed your cracks. You left your spiritual house unoccupied. The moment the next good-looking person glances your way, you find yourself right back in a compromising position (or two). And so your downward spiral begins- again. You must seal the cracks. Spend time discovering what God says about you and the gifts and talents He has placed inside of you. Allow the Lord to fill all the empty spaces in your life. He has created you for a purpose. When you fully understand what that purpose is, you will begin to walk in victory. And that victory won’t have time to wade in defeat.

God has created each and every one of us with a secret place that only His love can fill…. this is the God Spot. Allow Him to seal your cracks and fill your empty places with His love. I promise you will never be the same again. With His help, you can live a life of abundant joy and peace. Don’t worry about how you’ll get there. Just take it one day at a time and commit to the process. Yes, crack kills, but it doesn’t have to kill you.

Practically Yours,

~The Practical Chick

P.S. If you are dealing with domestic violence, or you have been involved in a pattern of abusive relationships, help is available to you! Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1 (800) 799-SAFE (7233) or log onto http://www.thehotline.org. Advocates are available 24/7. Anonymous and confidential.